


Keep, Leave

by GeryonWoods



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst and Romance, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/F, Hurt/Comfort, More people show up down the line so I'll add them as they come, Mutual Pining, Or the people I know will be vital to the story, Romance, These are just the characters that are in the first chapter
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-19
Updated: 2017-06-19
Packaged: 2018-11-16 01:10:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11243163
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GeryonWoods/pseuds/GeryonWoods
Summary: In the year 2098, the technology that gives people the power to erase memories from their minds exists, but it comes at a cost substantially higher than money.We’ve all experienced heartbreak. We all have that one person we’ll never be able to stop thinking about no matter how hard we try. But…what if you could? Who are you if your memories are something you can selectively pick and choose? If people can delete others from their lives, what happens with couples who are absolutely meant to be? How does a memory wipe affect them? Will they eventually find their way back to each other?ORClexa and Sci-Fi that doesn't defy every law of physics. Rothenberg can't relate...





	Keep, Leave

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is an adaptation of one of my personal favorites from the hundreds of screenplays I've written throughout the course of my career. I originally wrote it back in 2014. It's almost been produced twice but ultimately fallen through last minute as a result of money issues. I have original concept art/designs for all of the technology and basically everything else described here. This world exists fully developed and in 3D inside my head. 
> 
> We jump about 80 something years into the future and suddenly we can realistically explore this sci-fi scenario. We dive into this hypothetical, hyper-advanced (yet not that different from ours) society where technology has achieved memory manipulation…but then you're suddenly confronted with questions regarding the morality of toying with the core of a person and how that affects us as humans. I wanted a world where I could explore all of this and here is where I ended up. 
> 
> I've had to do quite a few tweaks to adapt it from script to a CL fic because the original script follows five couples and is an ensemble where each pair is coming into this process with incomparable life experiences which means they all tackle it and are affected by it differently, but I think I can make it work with just one main couple as well. I hope :p
> 
> \---
> 
> I don't have a beta. Any and all errors are mine.

**2098 AD** **  
** **Los Angeles, California, United States **

Twenty four year old Clarke Griffin and twenty seven year old Lexa Woods sit across from each other in a futuristic, yet minimally furnished kitchen. On the right side of each of their temples a circular electrode with a slate finish approximately the size of a dollar coin. The table they sit at is topped with a thick, translucent, frosted glass that is supported by matte silver legs. A vibrant light source emanates from a slit across the middle of the table creating a holographic touch screen. The screen is populated by a series of colorful thumbnails with titles under them. Clarke and Lexa each hold a twelve inch glass tablet that seems to be displaying similar thumbnails except for the fact that the screen on the tablet is split in three parts. The first column is the thinnest and scrolls vertically displaying the same thumbnails that are floating over the table but in a more concise manner. The other two columns are of equal size.  One half is topped with a header that reads _“Keep”_ the other reads _“Delete”_. On each side, dozens of thumbnails with their respective titles. They include things like “Cabo San Lucas”, “March 2095”, and “PHOX @ The Hollywood Bowl”.  
  
Lexa raises her hand to the screen and with a swift hand motion the thumbnails begin to scroll right. One stands out to her and with another effortless hand gesture the scrolling on the screen stops. She taps her fingers on the air effectively clicking on it and the thumbnail becomes full screen. In the middle a play button appears. Lexa presses it.  
  
A video of her and Clarke in formal wear standing in a garden holding lit sparklers in their hands starts playing. The bright embers from the sparklers light up the dark space. On screen, Lexa laughs joyfully and looks behind her at the crowd of people gathered in the gazebo dancing and drinking. Clarke leans up to kiss Lexa but before their lips can touch Clarke lifts her hand and waves it in front of the screen which pauses the playback. Lexa rubs her forehead and knots her brow before inhaling deeply and speaking.  
  
_"Octavia and Lincoln’s wedding."_  
  
_"Take."_  
  
Lexa looks almost offended.  
  
_"Wow...that easily? That was the night of our first kiss."_  
  
_"Take it."_  
  
Clarke tells her firmly. Lexa drags the file into her _“Keep”_ column and Clarke drags it to her _“Delete”_ column. Lexa looks dejected as she does.  
  
_"Are you sure you don’t want this one?"_  
  
_"Lexa..."_  
  
Clarke's tone let's Lexa know they're not rehashing yet another of the several arguments they've had that day over quite similar things. Clarke scrolls through the thumbnails once more trying to change the topic. She clicks on another thumbnail. The playback is of the two of them making silly faces as they try to take some selfies at the beach. She looks at it with nostalgia.  
  
_"I’ll keep this one."_  
  
_"Come on! You know I love that weekend."_  
_  
_ _"Well, I want it."_

Clarke would be lying if she said there wasn’t at least a hint of pettiness behind her wanting to keep these particular memories. She did know how much Lexa loved that weekend, she was well aware.  
  
_"I’ll trade you the night you finally beat me at chess for it."_  
  
Lexa attempts to barter as she scrolls through the screen trying to find that particular thumbnail.  
  
_"Why are you making this so complicated? Here..."_  
  
Clarke practically swats Lexa's hand away from the screen. Once she’s in control again, Clarke scrolls back to the thumbnail of the silly faces at the beach and drags it to her _“Delete”_ folder.  
  
_"There."_  
  
Clarke utters firmly as Lexa notices what she did.  
  
_"Clarke..."_  
  
_"Lexa, I’m not doing this. Keep it."_  
  
Lexa drags the thumbnail and adds it to her _“Keep”_ screen. When she does, the title appears underneath. It reads “Engagement Weekend”. Lexa stares at the words and feels her stomach churn.  

* * *

_Retentia: Neurologic Therapeutics._  That's the name of the company that changed the way the world worked. Retentia's origins can be traced back twenty five years to when famed neuroscientist Callie Cartwig and her team were conducting in depth research and performing studies that focused on the mapping of neural pathways in the brain, neurons, and axons. After an accidental discovery where Cartwig learned that memories are stored in specific brain cells, the primary focus of their research was instantly diverted. Cartwig soon learned that by triggering a small cluster of neurons, they were able to force their subjects to recall a specific memory. By removing those same neurons, the subjects would lose that memory. In an instant, humans had the power to quite literally rewrite their own or someone else’s history. Not long after, Retentia was born and it is presently one of the biggest multinationals in the world.

With centers operating across every major metropolis in the globe, Retentia has become a staple in modern society. Their California center is easily their crown jewel seeing as it also doubles as their headquarters.The building was erected on the side of a Malibu hill directly overlooking the Pacific Ocean. The architecture of it is fluid, every line and structure has a direct opposite, nothing exists without a parallel, there is symmetry at every turn. The building is white with teal and slate silver accents and the walls are floor to ceiling glass. There was no other way to describe this structure besides sleek and modish.

Clarke and Lexa walk into the expensive looking lobby. They each carry a canvas duffle bag filled with enough clothes and other essentials needed for a few days.  
  
At the front desk and across from the unmissable Retentia logo sits the brunette receptionist. Her name tag reads "Fox". Clarke walks straight to her.  
  
_"Good morning. Welcome to Retentia. Name and appointment time?"_  
  
_"Morning. Griffin and Woods. 10AM."_  
  
Fox pulls up her tablet and scrolls through the appointments.  
  
_"These are your intake and disclaimer forms. Please have a seat."_  
  
Fox plasters a rehearsed and fake smile as she hands each of them two seven inch tablets with several legal forms on them and a pair of styluses.  
  
Clarke takes hers and walks to the row of plush teal chairs on the opposite side of the room. She promptly takes a seat. Lexa nods at Fox and smiles weakly before taking her tablet and stylus and dawdles over to where Clarke sat. Clarke doesn't bother reading the papers. She moves to every marked line and signs without hesitation.  
  
Lexa sits next to Clarke, her eyes scanning the screen on her assigned tablet diligently and mulling over the contents of the documents while simultaneously throwing glances at Clarke in an attempt to read her. The moment she’s finished signing, Clarke stands to return the clipboard to the receptionist.  
  
_"Thank you. You can head on to the 12th floor. You’ve been assigned to Dr. Tsing. Room 1217."_  
  
_"Thanks."_  
  
Clarke turns to Lexa who still sits staring at the tablet.  
  
_"Lexa...she’s waiting."_  
  
Lexa shakes her head in resignation and signs the forms. Lexa stands and returns the tablet and the stylus to Fox who offers an empty smile in return.  
  
Before Lexa had even finished the hand off, Clarke was already walking towards the elevator. Lexa has to speed walk to catch up with her. Clarke presses the “up” button. They wait.  
  
_"We don’t need to do this."_  
  
Lexa's comment earns her a glare from Clarke but no verbal response.

* * *

Clarke and Lexa sit adjacent to each other in a pristine waiting room. Clarke purposely left an empty chair between them. Three other couples sit scattered across the room. There's a straight couple in their thirties, a lesbian couple in their early twenties, and a gay couple on their forties. Every one of them looks just as uncomfortable as Clarke and Lexa do. It's evident no one is particularly happy to be there.  
  
Moments after Clarke and Lexa sit, a fourth couple - straight and in their twenties - walks in the room. The couple scans the space to decide how to proceed in regards to the available seats. They spot three open chairs in the far corner and occupy them while also leaving an empty chair between them.  
  
A dignified Indian woman wearing an unblemished white coat with "Dr. Lorelei Tsing" carefully embroided over her left breast enters the waiting room from the hallway to their left with a small tablet in hand.  
  
_"Clarke Griffin and Alexandria Woods?"_  
  
Clarke and Lexa both stand up and walk behind the doctor in silence.

* * *

The technology in this office is nothing short of cutting edge. Lexa’s eyes scan the room taking in every detail while Clarke keeps her gaze fixed on the woman across from her. Dr. Tsing constantly hums to herself as she scrolls down the screen reading the file.  
  
_"Five years is quite a long time. I have to warn you, a full extraction will be quite painful. There’s less invasive methods we could..."_  
  
Clarke curtly interrupts her.  
  
_"Dr. Tsing, we’ve read up on the risks and the recovery time."_  
  
Dr. Tsing looks at Lexa who is now actively trying to avoid her eyes.  
  
_"The strain the procedure would put on the neural pathways is severe and..."_  
  
Clarke interrupts Dr. Tsing yet again and speaks with certainty.  
  
_"We want the full extraction."_  
  
Lexa looks at her lap and adds nothing.

* * *

Clarke and Lexa step through an automatic sliding door and into a room that must have been twice the size of their apartment. Jackson, their nurse, follows a few steps behind holding a tray with an array of instruments Lexa wouldn’t have been able to identify even if her life depended on it.

There were panes of frosted glass separating the space and blocking different sections, but the ineluctable piece within the room was the eight foot tall booth that stood in the middle of the room. There was a single step that led up to it. The booth itself was completely transparent and it was separated in two equal halves by a pane as transparent as it’s outer walls. On the floor inside each compartment Clarke could see the outline of two feet that evidently marked where they should stand. On the wall behind where she now understood they would stand there are two screens that must have been about fifty inches in size.  
  
Clarke and Lexa walk up to the glass booth. As they do, the tension and level of awkwardness between them escalates to unprecedented levels. Jackson stops and turns to them. He grabs two metal circles identical to the ones they wore before in their kitchen, except these are about the size of quarters. Jackson brings the first pair up to Lexa's temple.  
  
_"This will sting."_  
  
Jackson speaks just as as he places them on each side of her forehead giving Lexa no real warning or time to brace. She winces when the electrodes unavoidably zap her.  
  
Lexa looks at Clarke, but discovers her ex-fiancée actively moving her eyes towards anything and anyone but Lexa. Jackson turns to Clarke and places the circles on her temple. Clarke strives to mask her discomfort but ultimately squirms, albeit almost imperceptibly. Of course, Lexa most definitely notices.  
  
_"You okay?"_

Lexa inquires concerned.  
  
_"Fine."_  
  
Clarke retorts dryly.

After placing different things into slots and holes around the booth, Jackson grabs the last pair of instruments from his tray. They’re long silver metal tubes with a sharp end quite similar to a syringe.  
  
_"This is for the pain. Some patients choose to see the flashes, but I recommend you take it. You must decide now because once the procedure starts the numbing agent will not work. All you need to do is insert it in the base of your neck. Any questions?"_  
  
_"None."_  
  
Clarke replies without even giving Lexa a chance to speak.  
  
_"You may step inside."_  
  
Jackson signals to the box as Clarke and Lexa walk up to their respective halves, step in, and close the doors behind them. They are now facing each other, only inches apart, but separated by the thick glass pane.  
  
_"Please make sure you remain as still as you can. I’ll be in the control suite. Take your time."_  
  
Jackson tells them before he begins to retreat from the pair.  
  
_"Thanks."_ Lexa practically mumbles as Jackson walks away. _"Hey...Jackson right?"_  
  
_"Yes."_  
  
Lexa addresses Jackson but looks directly at Clarke, never taking her eyes off of her. Lexa’s restlessness mounts even further with the coldness she finds in Clarke’s eyes.  
  
_"I read there’s some people who can come back from it, from the extraction. Is that true?"_  
  
Jackson walks back to the booth and looks into Lexa’s half.  
  
_"Some patients have tried reversing the process on their own, but it’s only worked a handful of times and they end up with a very spotty partial recovery at best. None of those patients had received full extractions though. No one can come back from this kind of procedure."_  
_  
_ _"Thank you."_

Lexa nods, her eyes still glued on Clarke.  
  
_"We should get started. Yours will take some time."_  
  
Clarke locks eyes with Lexa once again. Her stare is steely, intense, and resolute. Lexa fidgets with the dispenser in her hand.  
  
_"Clarke..."_ Lexa looks at Clarke almost pleadingly which prompts Clarke to quickly bring the syringe to her neck with the obvious aim of sedating herself. As Clarke is about to inject the numbing agent into her spine, Lexa storms out of her partition and speed walks towards the sliding door they used to enter just minutes ago.  _"Fuck this."_  
  
_"Lexa."_ Clarke watches Lexa storm off. _"Lexa!_ "  
  
Clarke exits the booth and stalks after Lexa. Lexa manages to leave the room as Jackson watches on unfazed. He's probably seen more of these interactions than he can count. Clarke reaches the door and exits the room hot on Lexa’s tail.

* * *

Lexa tromps down the hallway, away from Clarke and this entire nonsense. Lexa is several yards away from the room when Clarke catches up to her. Clarke grabs Lexa by the arm and spins her around.  
  
_"Get back in there!"_  
  
Lexa stops and turns to face Clarke.  
  
_"No.”_ Lexa’s voice is firm and unwavering. _“I’m not doing it. I don’t want to do it! This is insane Clarke."_  
  
_"I need..."_  
  
_"Please, Clarke. I can’t."_ Lexa pauses to read Clarke's eyes. The steadfast resolve that existed just seconds ago now gone. _"I’m sorry. I made a mistake, I hurt you. I'm aware and I've tried so hard to make up for it. I was even willing to go through with this because it's what you wanted, but I can't do it. We can still fix this. Once we go inside that thing...there’s no turning back. How can I..."_  
  
_"You?! This isn’t about you, Lexa. You’re right. You're doing it for me. You owe me that much."_  
  
Clarke glares at Lexa with a fierceness that made Lexa understand there was no remedy for this, they were beyond repair. Before Lexa has the opportunity to respond Clarke walks away from her, down the hallway, and back into the room they were just in.  
  
Lexa lingers in the hallway. She leans her body against the wall not being entirely positive that she can hold her own weight. Within seconds she breaks down. Her body convulses with the intensity of the sobs. Lexa has never been a crier, she’s always found it counterproductive, but right this second she has no idea what else to do. Her heart truly is shattered and if she’s about to lose everything her and Clarke had, she might as well give herself a chance to mourn that loss while she still can.   
  
Lexa doesn’t allow it to go on for long. She weeps for two minutes before composing herself, drying her eyes, and making her way back into the room.

* * *

When Lexa walks back into the space, she finds Clarke stoically standing in the booth waiting. Lexa takes firm steps and within seconds she walks into her half of the box and settles into the position Jackson indicated. Lexa takes every inch of Clarke in and tries to remain composed.  
  
Not wanting to stall any further, Clarke inserts the metal object into her neck and winces. Lexa places hers in her pocket.  
  
Jackson's voice emanates from behind the frosted glass that separates them from the control panel. His words sound as if they came through loud speakers.  
  
_"We’re set to record the introductory message. Just let me know when you’re ready."_  
  
Lexa nods and braces herself.  
  
_"I’m ready."_  
  
The lights around her dim down to almost complete darkness except for a single light illuminating both Clarke and Lexa’s faces.  
  
_"We’re recording."_  
  
Lexa looks straight into Clarke's glossed over eyes barely holding back the tears.  
  
_"Clarke...I...you..."_

* * *

The extraction process is fully underway. As memories are extracted from their minds, the images replay and are projected in the screens behind them.

Clarke stands motionless, almost robotic. Her eyes and pupils dilated and out of focus. She's not mentally present.

Lexa writhes in excruciating agony but does her best to keep herself standing and her eyes on the flashes appearing behind Clarke.

* * *

The first memories to go are the most recent ones. We see a flash of something that happened mere minutes ago.

Dr. Tsing stands but hesitates and sits back down. She is always more than conflicted about authorizing full extractions that are this invasive and that involve these many years worth of memories. The number of things that could go wrong is too high.

Clarke and Lexa look at her, confusion scribbled all over their faces. Dr. Tsing addresses them.  
  
_"I need to know you understand that once the procedure is complete and the archive is created you won’t remember what was extracted unless you willingly plug in and that even then what you see will feel like clips of things that happened to someone else. You will also only have access to the memories you agreed to keep during the allotment process. You're fully aware of this, correct?"_  
  
Clarke and Lexa look at each other for a millisecond.   
  
_"We understand."_  
  
Clarke replies for the both of them. She looks nonplussed. Lexa looks utterly destroyed.

* * *

The extraction process is complete.

Clarke and Lexa crumble to their knees, undisputably too weak to stand. Four female nurses rush in to grab them and lift them up as they carry them out of the extractor.

* * *

Lexa is completely knocked out and slumped over on her wheelchair when they push her out of a door with a warning sign that reads:  

**_“CAUTION: MEMORY EXTRACTION IN PROGRESS.”_ **

While a nurse pushes Lexa in one direction, another nurse pushes an unconscious Clarke in the opposite direction.

* * *

Three days have passed. Lexa packs the last of her belongings back into her bag. A data drive approximately the size of a business card inside a transparent envelope with her name neatly typed on it rests on the bed next to her duffle. Lexa picks it up and examines it carefully for a long while.

Lexa swore she would never use Retentia. Her life and her memories were her own, not to be messed with. Those experiences were an integral part of who she was. What could have possibly made Lexa change her mind? What could have brought her here? Whatever it was that lead her to this room must have been disastrous and Lexa isn’t sure if she was thankful or fearful for what may be on that drive. Most people rescind their data or leave them stored in some remote facility which removes the temptation to look, but Lexa chose to keep hers. It was next to her bed when she woke up. She wanted it close. What could’ve been bad enough that she decided to forget, but at the same time not sufficiently calamitous that she didn’t want it all permanently gone? That confused Lexa more than the extraction itself.  
  
Lexa lets out a sigh before she picks the drive from the bed and stuffs it in her pocket. Lexa exits the room without paying any attention to where she’s going.

* * *

Lexa absentmindedly walks through the buzzing lobby. Her focus is clearly elsewhere and her mind is nothing short of overwhelmed with more questions than she could ever begin to have answers for as she walks towards the front entrance.

A few feet down she bumps into a warm body and almost knocks the person over. Both Lexa and whoever she had collided with quickly regain their composure. Their eyes promptly meet and they look at each oththe perplexed. Do they know each other? Those sapphire eyes feel so very familiar to Lexa but she doesn’t recognize the face attached to them.  
  
_"Sorry."_  
  
Lexa somehow manages to mumble to the intimidatingly attractive stranger in a sincerely apologetic way.  
  
_"No. Totally my fault."_  
  
Lexa smiles. So does the blonde girl. They awkwardly linger for a few more seconds before they each decide to move in the opposite directions they were moving towards before the unexpected crash.  
  
The blonde girl walks a few feet before something she can’t really comprehend overcomes her and she turns around.  
  
_"Hey..."_ Lexa turns to see the stunning girl facing her. _"I’m Clarke."_  
  
_"Lexa."_  
  
_"Nice to meet you Lexa."_  
  
_"Same."_  
  
Lexa laughs sheepishly. Why is this girl making her so high-strung? And why does Lexa immediately feel a degree intimacy that she's never felt with anyone before? They just met. This is bizarre.  
  
Clarke turns and continues to walk in the direction she was originally headed. Lexa nods and follows suit. They both have broad smiles on their faces as they try to make any sense of what just happened.

* * *

Lexa exists through the main doors and out into the balmy summer day. Lexa stuffs her hand in her pocket and pulls out the drive she had stashed just minutes before.  
  
Lexa stares intently and the matte metallic item in her hand as she hovers by the door. She turns to look inside and sees Clarke speaking with Fox at the front desk. Clarke laughs and something inside Lexa jolts. Lexa eyes linger on Clarke’s face for a moment before looking back down at her drive, safely putting it in her pocket, and walking away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thoughts? Comments? This will most definitely not be even remotely as angsty as the other fic. I won't make you guys cry with this one. Probably. Maybe. No promises :p


End file.
